Hey Fat Girl.....

Hey.  Fat Girl.

Yes, you. The one pretending to not see me when we cross paths on the running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy. You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make you cringe.

You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.

You are awesome.

If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.

You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is possible.

You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people, know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health, “starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.

You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.

I bow to you.

I stole this from another blog, but it's amazing, and I wanted to keep a copy of it. 

That being said - I really don't have an update.  I am on Day 25 of my Migraine.  I have been ordered by my doctors to do absolutely no strenous exercise untill I have been cleared by the Neurologist.  The problem is, I don't see the Neuro Doc for another two weeks. 

In the meantime, I have bumped my calories back down to a deficit so that I can try to savor what I have already lost, instead of gaining it all back.  So far, so good.  I jumped on the scale yesterday (with Today being June first and all), and I was 212.8.  No gain, so that is good.  I thought I would be at 190 by this point, so I do have some catch up to play once I am cleared by the doctors.  I am overwhelmingly frustrated with all things Health related.  My head, my weight, my freaking medications that they can't seem to figure out.  I am missing out on so much - it's driving me crazy.  Literally.  And I have been pretty irritable lately too.  I probably won't post again until I get news from the Neurologist.  That is, unless you guys want me to post everyday that I have a headache, I went to work, I was nauseous - so I didn't eat, I took migraine medicine that is not working when I got home, and then went to bed.  Because that's been my status update every day for the last 25 days.... 

Yeah, that's what I thought.   

Fat Girl - OUT!